Flying Solo

Allen is in Wisconsin this week for work related purposes.

I am in Tennessee this week...because we live here. 

Our 3 boys are not in Wisconsin this week.  They don't work.

Our 3 boys are here in Tennessee with me...because they live here.

Let me state for the record that I have a great deal of respect for mothers or fathers who are in positions that require them to be the only caregiver for their children.  It's exhausting.  I'm worn slap out.  Pooped.  Wiped out.  Get my drift?

Let me also state for the record that I have a great deal of respect for anyone who has to sleep by themselves.  I hate sleeping by myself.  I like knowing that if something terrible were to happen there is another adult to fight my battle for me.  I'm not brave.  I'm the lion from wizard of oz.  My sense of hearing is impecable when Allen isn't here at night.  The train that passes by our house every single night suddenly sounds like the grim reaper coming to kill and torture me.  Or a legion of vampires...but not the glowing kind from twilight.  These vampires are out to kill me till I die. 

I also like knowing that when the baby cries if I fake being asleep for long enough Allen will feed him.  Don't nominate me for mother of the year.  Get off your high horse you've done it too. 

Love them today.

Since the arrival of the two babies we've been asked one particular question at least one bazillion times by complete strangers, family, friends, acquaintances, the bag boy at the grocery store, random homeless people...OK so not that last one.  I threw it in there to see if you were paying attention.

Here's the question phrased a couple different ways.

"what will you do if you can't adopt them and they go back to their parents?"

"What will you do if they take them away?"

I by no means would call us "seasoned" foster parents.  We've had many different experiences and many different children, but not nearly as many as most.  So I'm not sure if my way of doing this is the best way to go about it but through losing Gabby and Anna and then going through our other foster children (and teens) who have been in our home I'm doing this the best way I can, and the only way my emotions will let me.  Beyond a shadow of a doubt I will be devastated if these boys have to leave us, those thoughts cannot dictate my life and my relationships it isn't fair to anyone...especially my children who need me today. 

My answer is always the same to these questions.

I love them today. 

I wake up in the morning and dedicate every breath, and every moment of my day to ensure they are loved...today.  They are my children regardless of who they came from or what they came from and they will be treated like I would treat a child that I've adopted or birthed (although the birthing hasn't  happenedd)

I adore them...today.  I refuse to let my mind wander into tomorrow and the things it may bring.  If I am constantly worried about if or when we will be able to call these 2 babies "Pruitt's" then that is valuable energy I am wasting that I could be giving to my boys today.  I never want to pull back, or be hesitant to grow strong and lasting bonds and if my thoughts constantly center around when or if they leave is a vicious cycle that I will not start. 

They are mine today.
I love them today.
I am their mother today.
They are my sons today.

Today.  That's all I have with them, and that's all you have with your children/husband/parent/friend/sister or brother.  Tomorrow isn't promised for anyone.

I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I know who holds it.  The creator of tomorrow has commissioned me to love these children TODAY, and He'll work the rest out. 

 Love them today. 
Make memories with them today.
Make their life amazing today.

The In Between

Hey everybody!  A whole month has gone by and I've not posted one thing!  Sorry about that.  For some reason blogging has taken a backseat to life lately. 

I've sat down to blog several times and then discover that
-someone is hungry and I'm the only person who can remedy that
-someone has pooped, peed, or spit up all over themselves and I"m the only person that can remedy that
-the laundry is taking hostages and I'm the only person who can offer a peace treaty
-dinner needs to be fixed and I'm the only person who can fix it
-I smell like curdled spit up that is 17 hours old and I'm the only one who can shower myself
.
anywho....I'm a little on the busy side and I'm loving every minute of it.  Except maybe the 17hour spit up, I really need to work out a better system.  I'm trying to cut down on the laundry and my thoughts are if I change my shirt every time it gets dirty I'd never leave the laundry room.  AND I'm trying to save the planet and save water....OK not really but I'm gonna use that line for as long as I can.  Maybe Al Gore will buy into that mentality :p

I've got some time on my hands right now though and instead of sleeping I thought I'd take a little time to tell you all the stuff that happened in between this blog and my last one. I'm considerate of your feelings....and aunt Susan sent me a text message and told me to blog.  I don't mess with aunt Susan...she's bossy (love you aunt Susan!) .

I managed to convince a sales lady at a certain "plus size" store that I'm still holding onto baby weight from my 4 month old.  Here's how that conversation took place

Sales Associate:  do you have children?
Me:  Yes, I have 3.  One is 6, one is almost 2, and the youngest is 4 months (notice I left out that I adopted the 6yr old, and the youngest two are foster placements)
Sales Associate:  Well my goodness!  When you loose all your baby weight from the 4 month old you won't even have to shop here anymore!
Me:  Yes Ma'am, your absolutely right. 

I take several moments during the day and tell myself that I gave birth to all the children who call me mommy.  It makes me feel better about being the size of a whale.  Don't judge me, I'm just trying to give myself pep talks.

I can't give out lots of details but the two newest additions to our family are doing quite well. 

I love every moment with them, and remind myself to take it one day at a time.  I'm called to love them today, tomorrow will work itself out.  But today you'll find me loving on these sweet babies. 

Ethan is "handling" first grade like a trooper.  Considering he'd rather be doing just about anything other then going to school.  I'm being selfish and enjoying knowing that he would rather be at home with his dear ole mom than at school.  I realize I have no bearing in this what-so-ever...he'd rather be at home playing cars, and monsters, and aliens, and transformers, and dragon ball-z, and other stupid boy games that I have no interest in because I love girl games.  I"m just there for decoration and food preparation.  Whatever.

We now speak with a lisp.  Why?  Because the sweet 23mo old talks with a lisp and it sounds cute when he does it, so Allen and I have taken up "lisping".  It's still cute when you re an adult right?  Right!?  Whatever.

I'm in route to Michigan to see Allen's grandmother who is sick.  I've never taken a road trip with an abundance of small children...I probably won't do it again either.  That should tell you how its going. 

"wahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!  boooooooo!!!!!!! hooooooo!!!!!!!"
"He's looking at me!"
"I want snacks!!!!"
"Mommy!!!!!  I spilled all my snacks!!!!"

"are we there yet?"

"I"m thirsty!!!!"

"are we there yet?"
"oops I need to pee pee NOW!"
"Stop touching me!"

And that is just stuff I've said...we won't get into the childrens vocabulary ;)

Life as a Mother of 3 Boys

I've been the proud mamma of 3 little boys for 9 days now.  All I can say is WOW, WOAHHHH, AND  Help me Jesus! 

All joking aside I couldn't be happier, or sleepier ;) 

The timing of our new family members arrival came at a very inconvenient time.  We got our 2 "baby brothers" on Friday afternoon and Allen left for an ENTIRE week on Saturday.  Leaving me with all 3 boys.  It was difficult to say the least but now more than ever I can see how many wonderful, caring, and helpful people God has placed in our lives because never during the entire week was I alone or without help.  I am so blessed with wonderful friends who stood in when my husband and family were fulfilling other obligations.

I knew in advance that 2 "baby brothers" would be a game changer, but it's one of those things you just have to go through to realize how much the game is going to change.  I love every minute of this new and exciting life and have fallen in love with the 2 new faces God has so graciously placed in our home.  We are praying that these faces stay here forever...feel free to pray that prayer too ;)

Here's how life is going around the booming Pruitt household-

* I can change 2 diapers in less than 40 seconds.
* Ethan gets the award for "worlds best big brother".  He.  Is.  Awesome.
* My dreams of becoming the "Von-Pruitt Family singers" might actually come true! 
* Someone is always hungry, or crying every minute of every day.
* Baby Bibs for a baby with severe gastric reflux don't exsist...so I'm working on a patent for that.
* Life is simply wonderful.

It isn't easy, it's definitly messy, but above all of that it is amazing. 

An answer to prayers. Many, many prayers

As many of you know Allen and I have been anxiously awaiting God to answer the cries of our heart to have more children. 

We've waited, waited, received phone calls about babies and for one reason or another those offers/opportunities didn't work out.  So we have continued to wait and pray.

And cry, and have emotional breakdowns and fall apart in the baby aisle at every store, and cry, and cry, and cry, have nervous breakdowns when encountering a baby, cry, cry, heartbreak, cry, and cry...o wait that was me.  Allen has been able to hold himself together better then me.  Basically the "waiting" process has been HORRIBLE! 

We knew that God had babies out there for us, but we wanted them in our time.  BTW "our" time was like 2 years ago. 

Ethan has always said "mamma Jesus will give us 2 baby brothers" or "We're gonna have 2 baby brothers one day".  This has gone on for about a year now, and each time he would say it we would respond with "well we hope so" or "we need to really pray for that".  Then I would find a corner to cry in...I fall apart easily can you tell?

Yesterday morning Ethan came into my room and woke me up, which is very odd because I am ALWAYS up before him he is NOT a morning person.  My baby boy loves his sleep...as does his mamma.  He woke me up and pointed to the room that would "someday" be a nursery and said
"Mamma we need to get that room ready, our baby brothers are coming". 

I was still reeling from waking up and the heartbreak of telling my precious son that would probably not be happening.  I got up and we went about our daily routine. 

At 1:30 yesterday afternoon I received a phone call.  It was our foster agency wanting to know if we were interested in 2 little boys.  A baby, and a small toddler.  We will be getting our 2 "baby brothers" today at 2:30.  Ethans baby brother are in fact coming very soon. 

As I type this blog out there is so much I want to share with you, but I'm afraid there arn't words to express what is reeling through my brain and heart. 

• I am thankful that Ethan kept the faith when I did not
• I am thankful that God didn't give up on my dreams when I did
• I am thankful that we are providing a home for "2 baby brothers"
• I am thankful for friends and family who have helped sustain me through these months and years of brokeness.
• I am thankful for a God who loves me and hears me, when I don't stop my whining to listen to Him. 
• I am thankful for a husband who is just as overjoyed as I am to welcome 2 "baby brothers" into our home
• I am thankful that God kept us from all the babies we ALMOST receieved, because His plan was for us to have these "baby brothers'. 

Thank you Jesus for hearing the cries of my heart.  Thank you for having a plan and a purpose, and for making my dreams come true.  Thank you for your faithfulness despite my attitudes, unbelief, and skeptical feelings. 

NOW! I get it.

Here are some phrases my grandmother use to tell me that made absolutely NO SENSE at the time, but now that I've aged a bit make a lot more sense and I even MIGHT say them too...occasionally.

-Make sure you have on clean underwear in case you get in a wreck!!!! 
   
-Remember who you are and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

-Please don't embarrass me.

-You don't have to pour on your perfume.  A little dab-will-do-ya.

-I dare you to pitch a fit, cause I ain't afraid to wear your butt out in public.

-Just because we have pasta and mayonnaise does NOT mean we have things to make pasta salad.

-Now that you've started shaving your legs, you must continue to shave your legs.  It's not a one time thing sweetheart.

-want in one hand, spit in the other, and see which one gets full first.

-you've got champagne taste with a beer pocketbook

-Don't speak something today, you're gonna have to rebuke tomorrow.

ahhhh ya gotta love good ole common sense...or so I'm told.  I'm lacking in that department.

Comings and Goings

You can always depend on change.

We've had quite a bit of changes happen in our home and I don't want you to feel left out, so I'll tell you about them!

We are a family of 3.  I must say that I am enjoying Ethan being an only child if just for a little while.  I adore the time I am getting to spend with him and am thankful God is providing this special season to pour all our love and attention on just him.  I have a feeling he is enjoying it as well. 

We manage to get into all sorts of fun things during the day, and only having one child to be responsible for is quite the change for me!  I'm used to 3 or more children at a time so this is a new experience for all of us.

We are excited and anxiously awaiting a phone call for more children to be placed in our home.  This is another reason why we are enjoying Ethan being our only child because we know that will soon come to an end and we will have more children and babies to love on. 

It has, is, and will continue to be the desire of our hearts to provide a home for any and all children who need us.  I know that God already has a wonderful plan in place and I become overjoyed at the thought of it!  God knows the desire of our hearts, so now we wait for those desires and dreams to happen!

My Thoughts on Prom

Ashley's senior prom is on Saturday.  So I'm going to take this opportunity to tell you how I feel about all this hustle and bustle.

• I'm to young for my daughter to be going to prom.  Let's just overlook the fact she is my foster daughter because it would be a national geographic moment if she happened to be my biological daughter.  I can't even get pregnant now, let alone when I was six!  (for any wondering minds she is 19 and I am 25),  
• You need to sell an organ to afford the basics.  The dress.  The shoes.  The undergarments.  The hair accecories.  The jewelry.  The makeup.  The matching clutch. The flowers.  The tan.  The this.  The that.  The everything.  
• I would never ever tell you what size dress or clothes Ashley wears.  How rude would that be?   So I will give you a FICTIONAL scenario to help get my point across   Let's pretend Ashley is a size 6.  If you buy a size 6 formal gown you will come home with something my 10 week old niece could wear.  Formal gowns run SMALL.  When you share with your teenager what size gown she will have to wear expect a meltdown.  If I have any teen readers out there listen closely.  Just because you have to buy a size 18 gown doesn't actually mean you are a size 18.  Take deep breaths and please don't have a meltdown in the JC Penney fitting room.  Your frazzled mother would appreciate it...especially when she has 2 other children that happen to be enjoying a rowdy game of hide and seek in the clothes racks.
• My prom dresses are still in style.  This says nothing about my styling capabilities and everything to do with the fact that I attended prom like 30 minutes ago.  That is only a slight exgageration it just SEEMS that way.  
• It is up to my husband to order her corsage.  That scares me.  
• I want to go.  I'm in need of a "formal evening".  The only prom's I'll be attending is as a chapperone. Chaperoning a prom is the things nightmares are made of.  Especially for this spring chicken. 
•    I'm looking foward to turning my house into the glam zone on Saturday.  I might put my wedding dress on and live vicariously through Ashley.  I'm all about stealing other peoples thunder.  
• Teenagers don't appreciate the value of a good pair underwear.  The kind that covers your entire rear.  Thongs and prom dresses shouldn't be worn at the same time.  
• I'm exhausted.  
• I'm excited. 

It will be a great day.  She's excited.  I'm excited.  Brings back good memories from my senior prom...and then I feel old. 

The Method behind my Madness

In 2011 I vowed to be better at where our money was going.  There were several areas where I could assist in saving our family money.  I also needed a project.  Don't get me wrong I adore staying at home and caring for my family.  But it also can drive me insane too.  I needed something other than my to-do list of childcare and cleaning and cooking.

 I saw an episode of extreme couponing and was hooked!  Now this is something I could really get into.  I began couponing in January and love every minute of it.  I enjoy seeing all the things I can purchase for very little money.  It takes time and it takes a game plan.  I will also say it needs to be something you WANT to do. 

As far as finances go we could have afforded to keep doing what we had always done.  But....why pay more money on things you HAVE  to have, when it keeps you from spending money on things you WANT to have?  Now that mentality really appealed to me.  My Ma always told me I had champagne taste on a beer budget.  Now I think beer smells like pee and the top of a champagne bottle scares the snot out of me.  Those suckers fly off at warp speeds!!!  I do get what she is saying however.  I like nice things; I can't always afford nice things.  I CAN afford nice things if I shave money off of the things that we HAVE to have.  Let me break this down for you. 

Spending less on hamburger helper leaves more money available for that dress you've been eyeballing in the JC Penney catalog.  Don't tell me I'm the only one out there who thinks like this. 

My husband likes it when I shave my legs in the winter time...even though I think it's silly.  That means I have to buy razors.  Good razors.  Not the pretty pink kind with one blade.  Those go dull on me before I get halfway up my leg.  With a little time I can get a GREAT razor (the kind with 4 blades and flowers imprinted on them) for less then what I would spend on a razor that barely shaves a portion of my leg.  Listen ladies I ain't skinny and I have a lot of ground to cover.  I neeeed a good razor.  Stores are smart they will almost always run a sale on an item that has a coupon running in your Sunday paper.  It's your job to sniff it out.  Pretend you’re a private detective.  You'll be so good at finding deals you can afford to shave your legs twice a month instead of once.  I currently have 7 different packs of 4 blade razors in my closet.  All purchased for less then a dollar a pack.  SCORE! 

My leg is not that sexy.  Sorry to dissapoint.

I get the best deals at Kroger.  They double coupons every single day of the week and they are wonderful at running sales for things you already have coupons for.  Walgreens and CVS rock when it comes to health and beauty items.  Keep your eyes and ears open Ingles will occasionally triple coupons.  The last time Ingles ran a triple coupon event my original bill was over 300 dollars and I paid around 40 bucks.  Hello pretty JC Penney dress!!!! You’re all mine now baby!

I really enjoy stockpiling.  It has nothing to do with the world coming to an end and living the rest of my days in a make shift cellar.  It's convienient.  I would much rather buy 10 of something when it's at it's rock bottom price.  That way when I need it I have it.  This means I don't have to put shoes on the boys, find coats, wipe snot from their faces, beg them to be good, drag them into the store, use one of those wretched straight from the pits of hell carts that have the car on the front of them,  and dodge the candy isle like its the plague.  I simply pull it out of my pantry.  I like simple.

I HATE these.  Welcome to motherhood, here is a shopping cart from hell as a welcome prize.

Another way I'm cutting cost around here is making my own laundry detergent.  It is safe to say I was very skeptical about this.  I like gain.  No... I love gain.  I still love gain.  I will always love gain.  On my tombstone it will say "She loved...Gain." I thought I would try out the homemade kind.  The ingredients to make it were dirt cheap and had 100 other purposes.  If I hated the homemade laundry detergent I could give it away and use the remainder of the ingredients for other purposes.  Then I could go back to my first love.  Gain.  I've been using the homemade version for a week now and I like it.  I wish it smelled like gain but I just use gain fabric softener and all is well.  My whites are still white.  My stains still come out.  My blights are still bright.  My clothes are clean and that makes this Mamma very happy.  I have 2 little boys.  They do number 2 often.  They don't always wipe the best.  Their underwear always comes out of the washing machine clean.  That is all it takes for me to be happy with the homemade version.  Here is a link for more resources on this subject.  I use recipe number 4. 

The cast of characters in my version of homemade laundry detergent.

Using Gain I spend almost 20 cents a load.  Using homemade I spend 2 cents a load.  I do many many loads of clothes almost every day.  I can now purchase the shoes to match my jc penney dress.  Hallelujah!  I'd speak in tongues if I weren't a diehard Baptist.  Shoes excite me.  So do purses. 

This picture made me laugh.  Maybe you are interested in saving up for a boob job instead of a dress I'm not here to judge what you are saving for.   Just here to help folks. 

I have been told that you can throw away all your household cleaners and use vinegar and peroxide.  I'm not sold on that.  I think vinegar smells like...well...uhm...it smells like vinegar.  Yuck.  I like the way Mr. Clean with febreeze smells better...and I typically always have a coupon for it so it's cheap anyway.  Google it!  Google is a genius.  I love Google and Gain.  Last time I looked vinegar serves over 200 purposes.  Unfortunatly it still smells like vinegar. 

You smell.

There is always something I can do to save us money.  Like I said it may take time, and you may need a get a game plan but you can do it!  Feel free to ask me any questions and I am more then happy to give you a baggy of homemade laundry detergent to see if you like it.  Now, I need to go I got a new JC Penney catalog in the mail today.  I have some shopping to do ;)

Spring Break thus far

What grand and glorious plans we had for Spring Break!  We had big events going on every day and this was sure to be a spring break to remember.  Have you ever heard the saying "If you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans"?  It's safe to say God got a good laugh in when I told Him about our plans. 

Here is how the week was supposed to go down...
Friday: Pigeon Forge for the weekend in a nice Hotel with an awesome water slide!
Saturday:  Enjoy the sights and sounds of PF, shop, swim, eat, shop, eat, shop, eat... Head home late Saturday night.
Sunday:  Church...all day
Monday:  Picnic in Cades Cove
Tuesday:  Aquarium
Wednesday:  Prep for Ashley's B-day
Thursday:  Science Museum and Nice dinner at my house prepared by me with family and friends for Ashley's b-day.
Friday:  We didn't have plans for Friday
Saturday:  Birthday Party for Ashley with her friends.  At our house

Here is how the week actually went down
Friday:  Went to pigeon forge and had a great afternoon. 
Saturday:  Woke up at 12:30am in severe pain.  Walked the floors and tried to remain as quiet as possible (so I didn't wake up the sleeping members of my family) while crying and trying to figure out what to do next.  I woke Allen up at 8:00am and informed him of what I thought was going on and we loaded up the members of our family and headed to the Urgent Care.  At 10:00am I was diagnosed with kidney stones given pain meds and sent on my merry little way.  We decided to head on back to Knoxville so I could attempt to pass the stones at home.  At 5:00pm I had a fever of 104, in severe pain, and was not able to use the bathroom so off we went to the ER.  After the ER medicated me and I was using the potty again I was sent home to pass the kidney stones and get to the urologist first thing Monday morning.
Sunday:  I layed in the bed all day crying and wanting my Ma.
Monday:  Went to the urologist my appointment was at 10:00am and I was finally able to leave at 4:45.  My children (all 3 of them!) had a blast...NOT!  It was then determined I had 3 kidney stones in various locations and a severe kidney infection.  My instructions were to drink lots of fluids, get lots of rest, and try to pass the stones. 
Tuesday:  Watched Disney movies all day and slept, and drank fluids, and slept, and drank fluids, and strained my pee pee, and slept.  And cried for my Ma.
Wednesday:  Urologist calls to inform the the infection in my kidney is very serious and I would need IV anti-biodics to help clear it up.  I hung up the phone, cancelled my Thursday plans and cried for my Ma.
Thursday:  Ethan is still able to go the science museum (Thank you Kim!).  I drop Ashley and one of her friends off to go have a birthday lunch and I head to the urologist to get my anti-biodics.  The dinner at my house is cancelled and we are going out to dinner instead.  There will not be one of my yummy homemade cakes but a store bought one instead.  Luckily Ashley is easy going and is completely happy with our current plans...even though I feel like the worst mother ever.  I haven't cried for Ma yet...but the night is still young
Friday:  The only thing I know will happen is a visit with the urologist to get an update on the stones and infection...depending on what I find out will depend on our plans for the rest of the day and possibly the weekend. 
Saturday:  I have no clue.  I have a feeling I will be crying for my Ma though.

What a week!  Remind me to NEVER make plans again! 

I said that?

A list of things I never thought would come out of my mouth....ever.

1.  Ethan!!!!  Why do you have worms in your pocket??????
2.  Quit drinking your bathwater!  I have no idea if you've peed in it or not!
3.  Please stop licking your knee, I've told you 3 times already!
4.  Can someone help me please????  I'm stuck on the washing machine!
5.  Ethan get the tampon out of your ear it isn't a q-tip.
6.  Stop sitting inside the refrigerator!  Our food will ruin and it's just odd!
7.  I can't remember the last time I took a shower.
8.  Coloring a picture of a monster and putting it underneath your bed does not actually mean you have monsters under your bed.  But that is very creative!
9.  Yes, you have to wear underwear to school.  And yes, your teacher called me and told me about you taking your underwear off at school yesterday and throwing them in the garbage.  You're busted!
10.  If you crawl in my lap one more time and fart I will sew your rear end together.
11.  If you crawl in my lap one more time and "accidentally" burp in my face I will sew your lips together.
12.  Who put hairspray in the microwave???????????
13.  My name is Mommy.  It is not "hey hot chick".  Thanks though. 
14.  How in the world did you fall asleep inside the laundry basket?
15.  Please remove the maxi pad from your forehead.  That doesn't make you a super hero. 

Yes, this is my life.  No, it isn't some crazy dream I will wake up from.  Wanna come for a visit?  Only the brave venture into these waters!

Do the following before having kids.

I recently had a conversation with a lady who doesn't have children yet, but is looking foward to having them.  I had never really taken time to think about how children have impacted my daily routine.  I love my life now and wouldn't change it for the world.  After this conversation I began to think about all the things I took for granted when my only responsibility was myself.  I have laughed all day when thinking about some of this stuff!  I will do almost anything to help others laugh so here we go!  This is "Becky's list of things to enjoy before children"

1.  Going to the store with nothing but your purse.  Prepping to go to the store takes almost as long as the shopping expirience.  First I have to plan when will be the best time to make the trip.  I am NOT a morning person.  I tried going grocery shopping when all the kids are at school, but due to the times the kids get out of school this method leaves me with very little time UNLESS I start really early, and I do not start anything really early.  Ever.  I also do not want everyone going to the grocery store with me.  My brain feels like exploding when figuring out deals and what brands to buy.  The thought of wrestling multiple children, a teenager, and a husband makes me wanna crawl under the covers and suck my thumb.   Once I figure out when will be the best time to shop I then have to begin preperations.  I try and get all my groceries in one big swoop.  Now begins the coupon clipping, planning out our meals, and then making the list.  Because there are so many of us it is always wise to do a double check on the essentials.  We've ran out of toilet paper before and I vowed it would never happen again!  When walking into the store I usually have my purse, my coupon binder, the sale paper, and a child (almost always Ethan).
So for childrenless couples or single ladies:  Enjoy going shopping whenever you want to, for whatever reason you want to!  Walk around, look at stuff, pick things up, smell them, whistle, hum a little diddy, you can even skip if you want!  Once you have kids you'll be crying and gnashing your teeth all while looking for bulk foods and bargain shopping.  You have been warned. 

2.  Enjoy time spent behind your bathroom door!  Take nice long bubble baths, light candles, play soft music, and relax!  When doing your business enjoy your quiet time!  Read a magazine or something.  After you have kids they will ALWAYS need something the moment your butt hits the seat, or your body hits the nice hot bath water.  ALWAYS.  During my last bath there were 20 little boy fingers sticking out from under the door.  They were telling me all kinds of stuff, I was holding my breath for long periods of time under the water.  But before I could even get in the bathtub it took me 20 minutes to get all the toys out of it!  Ethan is going through a clingy stage so while fixing my hair the other day he was climbing up my body in an attempt for me to hold him.  During this episode he also informed me I had to many bumps on my face and needed to put on that tan stuff (aka foundation).  I love my babies...really. 

3.  Stay up late and sleep late!  There will soon come a time when staying out past 8:00pm sends your children into spastic maniac fits.  One day you will plan out all activities based on what time you will be getting back home, so that your kids can get in at least 87 hours of sleep that night.  If they do not get at least 87 hrs of sleep then hell will descend upon your life.  I learned the hard way that keeping them up later doesn't always equal late sleepers.  It ALWAYS equals very little sleep for the parents.  I will say that there is no greater joy then waking up on saturday morning to find little fingers prying open your eyeballs, and little feet jumping on your internal organs in hopes that you will wake up. 

I don't want this to be taken the wrong way.  I WANT my life this way.  I love taking Ethan to the store with me and finding deals and planning out all the yummy food I can fix my family.  I don't care that it takes an act of congress to have a sucessful shopping trip.  I choose this life.  I love this life. 

If I didn't have 100 interuptions while behind the door of the bathroom I'd probobally get bored and have to think or something dreadful like that!  I love those little fingers that creep under the door, and all the stories that they HAVE to tell me at that moment.  I choose this life.  I love this life. 

I love the late nights spent rocking away a bad dream, I love knowing that I am putting my children first when making sure that they will get the sleep they need to be in good spirits the next day.  I love the early mornings spent making pancake breakfasts and listening about all the wonderful, messy things that make up a childs life.  I choose this life.  I love this life. 

I took many things for granted when my only responsibilty was myself.  But I would rather have taken that time for granted then all the blessings and inconvieniences that come with being a Momma.  I choose this life.  I love this life. 

Parenting Men

Many years ago I heard Dr. Phil giving parents of young children a valuable piece of advice.  When I heard this I was still in high school and didn’t give it much thought.  But recently it has been weighing heavily on my thoughts.  He said “You’re not raising little boys and girls, You are raising men and women” .   Stop for just a second and really think about that statement.  I can promise you that if you really think about that statement and how it plays out in your parenting you may start to change a few things.    This really hit home for me.  I started looking at the decisions I am making for my children and began to wonder if I am helping them become responsible adults or if I am teaching them how to be good children. 

I’m not saying that I am going to be a hard nose about every issue.  This is the only childhood they will have and I want it to be the best it can be.  I want them to embrace the carefree spirit that only a joy filled child can experience.  I want them to laugh and play and not be consumed about things that adults have to deal with.  As much as I would love to keep Ethan a little boy, I also know that this isn’t a reality.  It isn’t a fantasy I can afford to buy into.  I have a small window of time to instill Christian principles that he will need when faced with adult decisions.  Unfortunately society is making this window smaller and smaller.  Decisions that teenagers have no business making are appearing earlier and earlier in their lives.  If I don’t use every moment I have now, then I am wasting valuable time.  Here are some areas I am working on when parenting the little ones in my home.  I struggle every day and I’m not pretending to have this figured out.  But I saw an area that needed work and I am trying to improve. 

I have a tendency to want to spoil Ethan rotten!  I don’t want him to want for anything.  I want life handed to him on a silver platter.  I have a great deal of control over this if I am parenting a little boy.  I can buy him the things he wants, I can fix him the food he loves, I can pick up after him and never make him lift a finger. 

If I embrace the idea of “raising a man” then everything I mentioned above changes.  I bet we can all think of an adult we know that acts like a spoiled rotten child.  They aren’t pleasant to be around, and they don’t bring a lot to the table.  If the world isn’t constantly revolving around them and their needs then they make life as miserable as possible.  The world doesn’t hand things to us on a silver platter.  Chances are you will have to put forth work to get something in return.  We are trying to teach Ethan that in order to “get” then you must “give” something.  If he wants hot wheel cars then he must do something to earn them.  They aren’t an automatic purchase every time we enter the store. 

Facts are facts.  I will not always be there.  OUCH!  That was extremely hard to say.  As much as I don’t like this reality it doesn’t change its value of truth.  Mommy won’t  be there to pick up behind him.  I won’t be making his bed every morning, I won’t be cleaning up his messes, I won’t be going behind him fixing what he messes up.  It is Ethan’s responsibility to keep his toys picked up.  If he wants to walk into his room without a Lego cutting into the flesh of his foot then he needs to pick them up when he’s finished playing with them.  This isn’t a rule he is currently embracing.  I still have to tell him to clean his room multiple times a day, he reluctantly does it and each time he realizes that his world isn’t ending because he has to take a break out of his busy childhood to pick up his messes.  I don’t expect this to change anytime soon, and that is ok.  I will continue to force him to clean up his mess for many years to come if that is what it takes.  I’m doing this because he will make messes in his life.  He will make wrong decisions, and then have to face the consequences those choices bring.  I can’t clean up the messes of his life, I will want to.  I will desperately want to sweep in and erase all the negative and replace it with rainbows and sunshine…is that raising a man or is that raising a boy?  A man takes care of his responsibilities.  A man learns from his mistakes and makes every effort to correct the wrong.  Great men make mistakes every day, then they pick themselves up and try again. 

I am trying to put my parenting under a microscope and find ways to improve how we operate.  Are you raising little boys and girls?  Or are you raising Men and Women of God?

Glamorous

Let's take a walk down some of the glamorous things I got to do today shall we?  Prepare yourselves, you may be overcome with jealousy.

Started the day with laundry.  Laundry in this house must be done every day unless you want it to pile up and become completely overwhelming.  This weekend there was ZERO laundry done.  So a big huge pile of dirty clothes was waiting to tell me good morning. 

Ethan has a tendency to put EVERYTHING in his pockets.  I am amazed everytime I empty out his pockets.  He is able to fit more in a tiny pocket then I can manage to fit in my pocketbook.  The kid is talented.  Here is what I found today.
1.  A matchcar truck
2.  An aligator plastic toy
3.  Half of a fruit roll up
4.  Six rocks
5.  two lemon seeds (yes, this totolly confused me)
6.  A dried up snotty tissue.  I gagged.
7.  Mario figurine
8.  Piece of paper with his bible verse from S.S.

Are you impressed?  You should be.

By the time I get a few loads of laundry done and the kitchen sweeped and mopped it is now time to pick up Ethan from school. 

As soon as Ethan got into the van I could tell it wasn't the best of days for him.  He breifly shared what his day was like and asked if he could lay down.  Now I know something is up so I venture into his bookbag to see if his teacher had left me a note describing his behaviors for the day.  Here is a summary of the behaviors that landed Ethan into a bit of trouble at school today.

1.  Showed the entire cafeteria his underwear.  He also showed his sunday school class his underwear yesterday at church.  New rule for Ethan:  Never again is he allowed to wear underwear with superheroes on them, he is way to proud and feels the need to show EVERYONE.

2.  Pretended to be asleep and faked snoring when asked to write his letters.

3.  Finds passing gas hillarious and finds every oppourtunity to show of this skill in class.

4.  Find the need to sing at all times.  As loud as humanely possible.  Causing disruptions to the other 20 children in his classroom.

Then to make my day even more glamorous I accidently walk in on Ethan using the bathroom.  It scared him so he jumped causing his pee to go ALL. OVER. THE. BATHROOM.  Seriously, ALL OVER EVERYWHERE!

Really?  Can it get more glamorous then this?  I think not. 

O well!  I'd rather have my messy, crazy, amazing life then a glamorous life anyday!  This is my life and I love it.

Bookworms

The last few times I have walked past Ethans room he has been consumed in his books.  I'm used to walking past his room to find him playing hotwheels, buzz and woody re-enactments, or his latest dance moves.  So to find him lost in a book is a neat diversion from the normal. 

My Ma used to read to me all the time, and I loved it!  She didn't just read she would actually act out the parts and use different voices for different characters.  The book would come alive!  I try and do the same with Ethan but I'm not as smart as my Ma.  I forget who I have assigned what voice too, and then change from a brittish accent to an austrailian or from a mean guy to a sweet girl I get all messed up and confused. 

 In the beginning  it goes a little like this...

Goldilocks:  A sweet innocent girl accent
Mamma Bear:  Maternal brittish sounding voice
Pappa Bear:  Gruff older man voice
Baby Bear:  small little boy voice with a lisp

About halfway through it all starts falling apart...

Goldilocks:  Mean old man
Mamma Bear:  Little boy with lisp
Pappa Bear:  Sweet and innocent little girl
Baby Bear:  Maternal Brittish lady. 

Ethan gets confused, I get confused, Allen is hysterically laughing is tale off, and someone is typically always rolling their eyes. 

At least I try...right??  This is why I never made it big on the acting scene, I can't remember the correct voices.  I'm sure this is the only reason I never made it big on the acting scene.

So here is a sneak peek into the latest things you will find us reading here...

Allen is reading "Sun Stand Still"  By Steven Furtick.  He's loving it. 

Ethan is reading a book about dinosaurs...thats about all I can tell you.  I'm not interested in this particular read.  Dinosaurs do not intrest me in the slightest. 

I'm working on "A monster at the end of this book" with my good pal Grover.  I love this book!  It's a real page turner, I can't put it down.  It's really quite funny, you should read it too. 

Ashley is working on her geometry book...it's safe to say she hates it.  It's safe to say I hate it too.  It's safe to say it's all around a silly requirement. 

We've got all different genres covered here!  We are such a diverse group of folks.

Appearances

One of the reality TV shows I'm addicted to has a character who will not let her husband see her not looking her best.  While defending her way of thinking she stated that he deserves nothing but the best and she never wants to become one of "those" wives who stops caring about her personal appearance just because "he put a ring on it". 

I am one of "those" wives.  It has recently gotten really really bad.  Really.  Here's what I'm talking about.
I look horrific.  I am a HOT mess.  No not HOT as in smokin beauty queen.  HOT as in colossal disaster.  I thought once I started losing weight I would start caring what I looked like through the day.  Eh not so much. 

If if isn't sweat pant material, stretchy, or baggy there is great probability I will not be wearing it.  I wake up, take care of my babies, cook, clean, laundry, and do these tasks over and over and over again.  I have found that I can do these tasks with a lot more comfort if I am in gross unattractive clothing.  On the days when we have doctor appointments or home visits I go all out and put on jeans and a t-shirt. When I worked outside the home I HAD to look nice.  HAD to dress the part.  HAD to focus on making great first impressions.  Now that I don't have those requirements in my life I have turned my daily wardrobe into things that do NOTHING to improve my appearance.   I know there are women out there who love dressing in jeans and t-shirts and I think that is totally cool!  Nothing wrong with that AT ALL.  But that isn't me, that has never been me.  I'm not staying true to who I am and that isn't fair to me or those around me.  Here's the thing I LOVE looking nice.  I LOVE getting all made up, wearing nice things and looking my best.  I do not have an issue with dresses or skirts I love them in fact!  Now the only time you can find me looking halfway decent is on Sundays.  I am so happy we attend church because my poor husband would never see me in make up, my hair fixed, or attractive clothing if we didn't.  Sidenote: That isn't the only reason I'm glad we attend church FYI. 

As it turns out real housewives don't actually look like this.  At least not this one!

Now let me go ahead and say this is NOT a new years resolution.  It just so happens I came to the realization that I need to work on improving my appearance in the month of January. 

Now I'm not getting all crazy.  I'm not going to wear nice things every single day because it just isn't practical.  However I will be trying to work on not wearing clothes through the day that I may or may not have slept in that night.  My goal is to fix my hair, wear shoes, and make  an overall improvement in my daily wardrobe.  I have a really awesome husband who loves me whether I wear pajamas everyday or an evening gown everyday.  He tells me I'm pretty all the time and a lot of those times I am in pajamas and have no makeup on.  However when Allen comes home in the afternoon I don't want him to see me looking exactly the same as when he left for work that morning. 

The fact of the matter is I feel better about myself when I put more effort into my appearance.  I take pride in what my children wear and how they look, I take pride in how my house looks and keeping it looking nice, now I'm going to put that same effort into myself. 

I plan to start on Monday morning.  Hey!  I should go clothes shopping!  That is sure to get me excited about wearing nicer looking outfits through the day.  So glad I thought of that. 

Praise!

One of the blogs I read daily is hollyfurtick.com.  She is a stay at home mom and wife of Stephen Furtick pastor to Elevation Church in Charlotte.  Today she posted on praising our children.  She had gotten the idea from Michelle Dugger.  I also watched the same episode and wanted to share with you her thoughts and mine.  You can read Holly's blog here.

Someone once told Michelle Duggar that you are to praise your children 10 times more then you correct them.  And praising them in front of others multiplies the praise.  For example if you praise your child in front of 3 other people its like praising your child 3 times. 

So after hearing that I really started trying to apply this in our home.  It is easier said than done let me tell you that!  But you can see the boys pride swell and they glow after receiving praise especially in front of others, and then I notice that behavior popping up more and more!  So I am going to try and continue this.  Praise 10 times more then correct, and praise in front of others.

updates are in order!

i apologize in advance for typos this is being published on my droid.
it has been an unusual week, and to be honest i am glad its coming to an end.
still no word on the gabby situation, this emotional roller coaster is exhausting all of us.

Ethan completed his first full week of school...and no behavior sheets were sent home.  miracles still happen folks.  we are so proud.  he has homework everynight...am i the only one who finds this odd?  i also am involved in the pta program i feel way to young for this task.

i feel like i am on a neverending treadmill with no escape route.  but its a new week w/ new begginings.

tonight was wonderful we put the kids in bed and allen and i stayed up making yummy goodies for a cookout tomorrow.  it was like a date...only in the kitchen.  i love my husbad. i have some awesome recipe  posts planned for this week and a few other blog worthy items.  have a blessed labor day bloggers