My Thoughts on Prom

Ashley's senior prom is on Saturday.  So I'm going to take this opportunity to tell you how I feel about all this hustle and bustle.

• I'm to young for my daughter to be going to prom.  Let's just overlook the fact she is my foster daughter because it would be a national geographic moment if she happened to be my biological daughter.  I can't even get pregnant now, let alone when I was six!  (for any wondering minds she is 19 and I am 25),  
• You need to sell an organ to afford the basics.  The dress.  The shoes.  The undergarments.  The hair accecories.  The jewelry.  The makeup.  The matching clutch. The flowers.  The tan.  The this.  The that.  The everything.  
• I would never ever tell you what size dress or clothes Ashley wears.  How rude would that be?   So I will give you a FICTIONAL scenario to help get my point across   Let's pretend Ashley is a size 6.  If you buy a size 6 formal gown you will come home with something my 10 week old niece could wear.  Formal gowns run SMALL.  When you share with your teenager what size gown she will have to wear expect a meltdown.  If I have any teen readers out there listen closely.  Just because you have to buy a size 18 gown doesn't actually mean you are a size 18.  Take deep breaths and please don't have a meltdown in the JC Penney fitting room.  Your frazzled mother would appreciate it...especially when she has 2 other children that happen to be enjoying a rowdy game of hide and seek in the clothes racks.
• My prom dresses are still in style.  This says nothing about my styling capabilities and everything to do with the fact that I attended prom like 30 minutes ago.  That is only a slight exgageration it just SEEMS that way.  
• It is up to my husband to order her corsage.  That scares me.  
• I want to go.  I'm in need of a "formal evening".  The only prom's I'll be attending is as a chapperone. Chaperoning a prom is the things nightmares are made of.  Especially for this spring chicken. 
•    I'm looking foward to turning my house into the glam zone on Saturday.  I might put my wedding dress on and live vicariously through Ashley.  I'm all about stealing other peoples thunder.  
• Teenagers don't appreciate the value of a good pair underwear.  The kind that covers your entire rear.  Thongs and prom dresses shouldn't be worn at the same time.  
• I'm exhausted.  
• I'm excited. 

It will be a great day.  She's excited.  I'm excited.  Brings back good memories from my senior prom...and then I feel old.